God uses broken pieces

Grief touches us all. Sometimes there are seasons of life, sometimes events knock the wind out of our sails. I told you about a trying time for me coming to terms with the fact that I was actually depressed. That post is here. Ecclesiastes 3 sums that up pretty well:

There is a time for everything,
    and a season for every activity under the heavens:

a time to be born and a time to die,
    a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
    a time to tear down and a time to build,
 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
    a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
    a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
 a time to search and a time to give up,
    a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
    a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
    a time for war and a time for peace.

The only ways I know how to describe the feeling I had was either that I was lost at sea. I was bobbing up and down with the waves of life and catching air, but not really feeling that there were any life rafts. I felt very lonely and a bit paranoid that anyone else was able to help me.

Of course, through it all God was there. We had such a beautiful message on Sunday for those who were either in a season of grief or battling with something more long-term. About how God can use the broken places in us to bring healing to others and how, even in our pain, he is PRESENT with us.
Here's the link to that: http://renovatuschurch.com/#/podcast

All of this to say, it is good and necessary to remind ourselves that we are all human. That sometimes you just need to be sad for a while and sometimes you need to just CRY with someone else rather than try to cheer them up. I think as Christians and perhaps Americans, we are tempted to just put on a smile or say "I'm fine" when we're not doing so great. You don't have to let EVERYONE in to your cave, but you need to let SOMEONE into your cave. And even when your faith takes a beating, know that "Jesus wept" at the death of Lazarus. Odd, since he knew what he could do and was about to do--raise Lazarus from the dead!!! He wept because he wanted to share in the sorrow, not because he had no hope.

Be a lifeline to someone around you. Grieving alone is the worst. You don't have to have just the right words or any magic prayers. Pray for the peace of God and healing of the heart. If you sense a friend is down, ASK. Dig. Pray.

Take time to grieve when you need to. You get no brownie points in heaven for trying to paste on a happy face. Seek the Lord and His joy.

I'm doing much better these days, now that I've faced and named what was going on and have been using life boats of medicine and friends and even this blog. Joy really can come in the "morning."

Be my guest, Tracey Rouse

My friend Tracey Rouse recently moonlighted as a guest star blogger on my Pastor's amazing blog. Her post so aptly describes what I feel my own calling is, that I decided to have her be a guest star blogger on MY blog too! Welcome Tracey Rouse, everyone.



I have been Executive Pastor at Renovatus for all of six months and feel fairly unqualified at this point in my career to impart inspiring leadership lessons. However, in racking my brain over what to blog about, I realized that what I do have is a lifetime of experience in following. I also happen to think that concept of followership is an understated precursor to leading well, so maybe it is a good place to start!



My all-time favorite TV show is The West Wing. Fortunately for me, Pastor Jonathan knows the show well and appreciates (or at least tolerates) the unending references to it that I make on a regular basis. There is a scene from the show that sums up the roles of the Lead Pastor and the Executive Pastor at Renovatus well, I think, or at least it does for me! The Deputy Chief of Staff says to the President of the United States in a particularly poignant moment, “You know what the difference is between you and me? You wanna be the guy. I wanna be the guy the guy counts on.”


I’ve never aspired to be “The Guy.” It is of absolutely no interest to me in any context, really. I always want to be “the guy that the guy counts on.” (This is one of the reasons my current occupation is like living the dream!) I’m guessing growing up as the daughter of a Brigadier General might have played a part in some of this. Honor and respect were non-negotiable in my house. We placed a high premium on dependability and integrity. And naturally I developed a profound respect for uniting under one vision, for trusting in a chain of command, for following the leader. Orders are not optional and commands aren’t up for consideration. In the military, these principles literally protect lives and protect the mission. And while it is an imperfect analogy, it still translates into our context of church leadership. Do you take seriously the ministry you have been called to? Do you recognize the high stakes of what it means to actually be the church?


If so, I implore you: Strive to be the guy that the guy counts on, no matter what your ambition or calling. Follow your leaders. Trust in God’s lordship over your own life and over their lives, as well. They will not lead flawlessly, but extend the same grace given to you when you do not follow flawlessly.


Follow your leaders as they follow Christ (I Cor 11:1). Follow in such a way that inspires and empowers others to follow you.


Tracey Rouse is Executive Pastor of Renovatus: A Church for People Under Renovation.

Legacy

When you go to a church with a name as pretentious as "Renovatus," you're allowed to have a MANIFESTO instead of a mere mission statement or something.  ;) We recently rolled out a newly-tweaked manifesto. You can read it here.

Illustration by Jake Page
jakepageillustration.com

Recently, we enjoyed a sermon about the part of our manifesto that reads "We ARE your grandmother's church, and your great-grandmother's church, and your great-great-grandmother's church. We embrace continuity with the church's past. We seek intergenerational and cultural diversity. We will harness the classic spiritual practices and truths that transcend time and place. We are a local representation of a timeless community."

Many newly-formed churches think that they're reinventing church for a new generation and have abandoned all aspects of the liturgy and practices that former generations have practiced for...generations. One of the things I dearly love at Renovatus is the mix of old and new music and liturgies. I love that last week we had prayer for the "grandparents," and there were at least 40 down at the altar as we blessed them and prayed for them to "dream dreams" a la Acts 2 and to continue to be a vital part of our mission to renovate Charlotte. And of course, to share their wisdom and love with younger generations.

At our small group last week, we went around the circle and shared about our grandmothers and their spiritual legacy. Some had no real "legacy" within the church and broken relationships. Many of our grandmothers endured some kind of physical or emotional abuse at the hand of their husbands. But of the all the joyful, wonderful and sometimes tragic things we shared, I kept hearing about the RELATIONSHIPS we had with our grandmothers. Never once did anyone mention "and in 1987 she got this awesome game system for Christmas!" Some had grandmothers who were awesome cooks, some were real characters, some were Godly, some spoke of Jesus but not in the way you might hope (!)...but what came through was how they related to us and to our families. Strong women and sometimes broken women doing the best they could. It really made me reflect on the legacy I want to leave to Shepard and generations further down the line. I want to be known as a woman who brought the Kingdom of Heaven to earth through my prayers and actions and words. I want to be known for showing grace and mercy. I want to have gentle answers and a ready hug. I will likely never be the best-cook-in-the-world grandma, and that's ok. But I really do want to be known for encouraging, supporting, and loving those God has seen fit to send into my life.
Especially as we enter a season of giving, I have been wrestling with wanting to buy a bunch of "stuff" for Shepard, because it's fun to give gifts and is expected in our society. We somehow tie gift-giving automatically to the measure of our love. Commercials seem to tell us that in order to show our love, we must buy such-and-such. As Christmas approaches, I really want to give the gift of a rich, Godly legacy to those around me. That's something that will get passed down through the ages. It will not become tarnished and moth-eaten or go to the land of unwanted toys. Join me?

Christmas 2008 Wrap-Up

Typically, I get great joy out of wrapping a nice gift in some plain red paper and plaid ribbon...or some such configuration. I will attempt to wrap up a YEAR (hard to contain) in mere words (lowly containers, indeed).

So, if you'd like to stick around...here goes nothing.

Jerod and I have cruised swiftly through our FOURTH year of marriage! I can't believe that it's been four years already. We celebrated by taking a trip to Asheville/Biltmore, NC, at the beginning of December. (the first two pics)

I am slightly sad to say that we have only a few interesting milestones to share this year...(so if you were thinking of checking on the price of an 52" HD TV at Bestbuy.com, go ahead, I won't fault you).

We have been busy taking classes--his for teacher recertification, and mine for digital design. I have finished 21 of 33 hours (as of 12/10!) for my certificate. Lord willing, I'll be done at the end of this summer. No, I'm not sure exactly what I'd like to do with my meager photoshop and other adobe software skills...but I surely have had a BLAST learning this stuff and creating some meaningful projects. (click here for small design portfolio)

Jerod has been on his toes keeping up with his "kids" at school, and driving through Charlotte each day to go teach them. The work is draining and satisfying, as I'm sure all teachers out there can understand. He often gets feedback from current and old students about how much they love him as a teacher. I would have loved him as a teacher, too. He gets so darn excited about whatever it is he's teaching. His students this year have named him "The Math Daddy."

Good ole Winthrop University is my neck of the woods these days, as I continue to serve in the President's Office coordinating events and maintaining two historic homes. I love being at a place that serves as a home and a community as well as a place of employment. I think few people are so blessed as this. We're feeling the money crunch at Winthrop as a state-supported school. The state of SC keeps asking for money back...so at this point, we're nearly private. So, in that spirit, I encourage you to do all your Christmas shopping in the state of SC since it seems to be lack of money in the sales tax area that has been the biggest contributor to the shortfall. (Or fire Governor Sanford, whichever you can manage for me. :)

In March, I was again able to travel with the Men's Basketball Team from Winthrop to the first round of the NCAA Tournament. We were sent to Denver, CO, so I had a few days in the Rockies to explore, cheer on the team (we lost in the first round...), and see my cousin, Elasha. Elasha lives in the best little neighborhood near downtown Denver, and it was quite a treat all the way around.

June took us to Orlando, as I had convinced Jerod that we should use our economic stimulus check for its intended purpose. We had a blast at the Universal Parks, botanical gardens, and zoo. A great time for R & R after long school years for us both. My favorite was the Dr. Seuss land in Islands of Adventure. Everything looked candy coated and unreal. And of course I could ride "the Hulk" roller coaster all day without stopping (see pic below with my YIPPEE IT'S A ROLLER COASTER!! face). There is at least one post about that from June should you want to hit the archive and read all about it.

I don't know exactly what has happened to the last half of this year. One minute it was July, and the next, December. Classes and church functions and fun have been a blurry whirlwind, plopping us smack in the middle of the holidays. I still have my two faux pumpkins on the side porch with orange lights (not lit since October)...but the tree is up, and there is some sense of festive around the house.

Finally, I've been keeping busy with "The Birth: A Reflective Celebration of the Coming of Christ." A play that I'm singing in this Christmas...and also that I've done some of the graphic design for. There is a post from earlier this month with details about that. But for the sake of the wrap-up, between this play and the messages I hear at my dear Renovatus (church--click for website), I am reminded that the Jesus I believe in is very real. He very much came here to show us how to live. He very much wants to be part of our everyday lives. It is a truth that I face every day, as I navigate both "the mud and the muck" of this life, as well as the completely happy moments. Our community, our friends, our faith..it's the glue that hold us together.

Our hearts are grateful for another year to learn, to worship, to give, and to share with you. Merry Christmas, and may God bless you in the coming year.

Love,
The Joneses







Jerod's email: jeirdo@yahoo.com
Shelley's email: iamshelleyjones@hotmail.com
And, we're both on Facebook, too. Come "see" us!

My Christmas Gift to You

I have a long love of the stage--any stage. Not because I am the greatest performer, but more because I love the excitement, the rush, the edge of it all. (Speaking of 'edge,' I do wish someone had video taped my fifth-grade baton routine to the song "Fame--I'm gonna live forever!" as my baton came down unfortunately on the edge of the stage and was only saved by teetering on a mic stand.) I am a pretty lame actress, and my baton career ended, ironically, after the "Fame" performance. But I like to sing, and that seems enough for stage opportunities from time to time.

For the second time, this year I am privileged to be part of an intimate little production entitled The Birth: A Reflective Celebration of the Coming of Christ. We're very official this time around, as the director/creator spent countless hours setting up a cool website. I also got to test my graphic design skills by creating the poster (pictured).

So, I'm not just here to toot my horn...but to marvel in the story that we are telling. We are crafting an experience for our audience to participate in the Birth of Christ...the most cosmic and earth-shattering event that has happened since He created the earth itself! We are telling His story...we are singing His songs...and moving to the rhythms of His grace. It's quiet and powerful. It's entrancing. And I am humbled to take the stage here...my feeble attempt to illuminate the most amazing gift ever given. It's my Christmas gift to you.

We will step inside this story as He stepped inside a suit of flesh, to let the cosmic mix with the common. I invite you to join in the story of the ages, see the creativity of my friends who wrote pieces and songs, and of my cast-mates who offer their talents (like this boy offering his little star to the great big sky >>).

Visit http://thebirth.net and join us as we tiptoe on this sacred stage together.

The Fort Rock Stars

I often brag about how awesome my small group is--i.e. church small group. We call ourselves the Fort Rock Stars as we hail from Fort Mill and Rock Hill, SC. There is always great hilarity mixed with great spirituality. We have loads of seemingly dominant personalities, but somehow we have formed a community, seeking to be disciples of Christ, family, and fun.
A recent example: in the middle of prayer time (after 10 straight minutes of laughing time), John Zimmer prayed, "And Lord please help Paul...who has it all." (say it out loud if you need to and realize how awesome it is to rhyme while trying to be serious)
As with any pack of friends, we have our own quotes and jokes...and Michelle is the keeper of those. She will draw pictures if necessary to convey the moment. Elisabeth is loud and proud and is quick to let us know what is crazy with this world. Julia will cut to the heart of the matter and ask you the question(s)--40 usually--that will move you closer to God or will move her closer to understanding the matter. Paul sits in the corner with his own personal fan and drops on us alternate funnies and nuggets of wisdom. Jerod provides our insane animal trivia and the questions about faith that I can't begin to dream up. Richard was frightfully quiet at first, but has since become the master of the one-liner at the appropriate time. Iris lives out loud with an amazing mix of insight, acumen, and a lovely dose of humility. Dear Emily has been through more in the past two years than almost anyone I know, and the Lord has truly blessed her with a meek spirit and inner strength. She's our caring Mommy and our brilliant Harvard lawyer. John keeps us focused on the real meaning of Scripture, making sure that we are reading it well...then he shows off his white boy dance moves and makes me cry because I'm laughing so hard. And back to Michelle...her enthusiasm about everything is infectious...like you want to run and join whatever it is she has going on. And it's my job to corral all of this...(it's like herding cats). We nudge our hearts closer to the Cross, we learn patience and practice, and we laugh...the deep belly laughs of acceptance and love.
And just so you know the depth of our oddness, read this invitation sent via email to our group regarding this Thursday night's activity:
Kind people,
So as it is the Thursday before Thanksgiving Day,
So as we all may partake in gastronomical investigation,
In spirit of fellowship and healthful consumption of elements shared by our forefathers,
I, IRIS EMILLE ROWE HARTNESS, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Constitution and laws of the United States, do hereby proclaim Thursday, November 20, 2008, as Small Group Thanksgiving.
It would behoove you all to prepare or purchase a side item or dessert of your liking and bring herewith to said joyous occasion at the good hour of seven o' clock in the evening. Please respond to this communication piece with affirmative reaction and declare your intention to attend and what accoutrement will accompany.
Please take heed, the following has been fortuitously determined:
Main course: Hartnesses (Rotisserie Chicken...Since Emily did such a nice job carving the first one...)
Side: Jones (Stuffing ala Shelbur)

Good day and God speed.

And so, I give thanks right here on my bloggy for this awesome assortment of souls with whom I share my Thursdays.