7.31.2010

One month ago today

I had checked into the hospital for my first overnight hospital stay. I couldn't believe how calm I was. As I've mentioned before around here...labor and delivery was probably the thing in life that scared me the most.
I had a profound sense of duty on the delivery day though. Just a calm and peace. I knew that there was a job before me, and I set out to do my job. I didn't scream or yell or even cry (shocking!). I just breathed through the contractions, listened to the nurses and Jerod, monitored our progress...waited until 6 cm to get my epidural. That last hour before the epidural was pretty "special," but I lived. (Still don't know how women give birth without some numbing, but whatever...I don't get brownie points in heaven for having some help)
Even when the nurse said it was time to start pushing, I didn't freak out. I got a little nervous, but I knew my Mom and Jerod were there to pray and help as much as they could. They were both wonderful helpers. Since my eyes were pretty much closed the whole time, Jerod helped talk me through what I needed to do based on the nurse's reactions and instructions. I was pushing so well that she had to call in the doctor before she expected to.
And then, presto! Out came the baby in one big push. Once the nurse told me what to do and I realized it was within my power to get this show on the road as it were--I made sure we didn't prolong. I wanted to meet my little guy!
I couldn't believe my ears when I heard his little cry. Just perfect. We've had quite a first month, and there will be more on that later. I had a funny moment the other day when I realized I could now be the punch line of "Your Mama..." jokes.  Hee hee hee. I'm a MOM! Mama, Mother, Mum, Maaaaaaaaaaa! I have a new name. I have a new life. I have new purpose. It's not nearly as hard as I thought it would be. It's a joy. Even when I have to scrape myself off the bed after a deep nap. I barely mind it.

Just wanted to finally get a little post on my blog before too long. I still have thoughts and things to process and write about, so I'll be back. Meanwhile, I'm going to watch the little one sleep. And if I fall asleep myself, all the better.  zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz