Well, I had such hopes for the Justice Project that our fellowship was undertaking. I have had some mixed emotions with it since. My experience with the whole endeavor has seemed to be thwarted from every side. Neither of our people that we were given to work with and get to know has a working phone. And it's not like they live around the block so I can drop by at random times to check in. It's an hour round-trip...to knock on a door that no one answers. Our small group has spent some time in the neighborhood and have "adopted" some other people to some extent, but it hasn't been much more than some painting and eating and hanging out thus far.
One of our ladies landed in jail before we could form a relationship with her. We were unable to visit, and wrote letters. She seems in the most need for some friendship and support, but she's never home...and again...has no phone. The other lady has not been available up to this point yet, either.
Since March, when we started this movement, my work schedule has been spinning out of control. In addition to the classes I was taking through May and some new job responsibilities, I have had precious few weekends that were not already spoken for. I feel barely capable of handling my own home and responsibilities.
I believe in the Justice Project. I know that I'm too busy. How to clear the time? So much of what keeps me busy is not optional. I'm just purely frustrated right now. I need to pray that the Lord makes clear the path to help me walk into an obedient use of my time. What good am I to Him or anyone if I don't have time to help others?
I have known for years that ministry is not easy. It's not a walk in the park. It's dirty and challenging and doesn't play fair sometimes.
So, here I sit. Tired, defeated, and still hopeful. If we aim at nothing, we'll hit it every time.
1 comment:
I think God laid this neighborhood on the hearts of your small group for a reason. Maybe you could all focus your efforts on this one needy woman who was jailed. You wouldn't all be able to be there all the time, but perhaps it would be a more managable thing to divide up your time but focus on just one person or family who really needs the help of stable individuals who love God. Most of the people in the Bible who I think about who were the catalyst for real Godly change started really small like David showing obeidience as a shepherd boy and eventually becoming king. Anyway, I can feel your frustration, but I think you guys have a real heartfelt desire to help the people in this neighborhood, and I will pray that you are able to find a way to continue to minister in this area and that your frustrations will be fewer.
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