90 Days to go...my momentary meltdown

I was attempting to get dressed for work today. Most days, it hasn't been too difficult. Everything goes with black pants, right? I'm accepting the fact that I look sort of bulgy. But the forecast today was calling for temps in the 70s, so I thought I might whip out some sandals and let my puffy winter-feet breathe.
WRONG! The feet are already expanding a bit. I definitely have some sandals I can wear, but hardly anything suitable for work. It's just not cool to wear my birkenstocks to an event with a donor who gave "building money." I'm not looking to be a fashionista here, but I also don't want to look like a round lump of dump!
The only work sandals I had to go with brown wouldn't quite fit around the cankles. Change clothes completely. Black sandals that fit are my dressy back-ups...only suitable for wearing short periods of time and not for all day working.
So, I finally got myself covered and in socks and winter shoes and started my pity party. It's hard enough some days to get my job done (especially this time of year)...and then to have to maneuver dress outfits with dress shoes on fat feet. My lack of sleep and generally feeling of overwhelmy-ness just spilled out. I cried all the way to work. Not bawling, just frustrated.
I started thinking about all the events I have coming up, what I'm going to wear to them (I really have plenty to wear--don't let me fool you here) and how I am going to get everything done for them...and how tired they're going to make me...and how standing up at them is going to make my feet EVEN FATTER and I won't be able to wear ANY shoes I own...
You know.
The spiral.
To the pit of despair. :)
I walked in and had a few moments to compose myself and get my leaky eyeballs under control.
My boss walked in and handed me an April calendar of all "my" events. She had already written "Let's talk" on it. She proceeded to tell me that some of our other staff members could relieve me at some of these and to let her know which ones I'd need help or a substitute.
I probably looked at her like she was Jesus himself.
Because in that moment, she was. The Lord answered a prayer of tears. I saw no way around the sheer busyness and stress and long hours that I was facing. He did.
And on my lunch hour, I might have gone to Shoe Carnival and gotten a suitable black and brown pair of work sandals in WIDE a size up...fat feet need love too.

1 comment:

Hollie Heming said...

I found your blog through Justin and Jessica (I work with Jessica and have heard lots about you two) and I remember feeling the exact same way when I was pregnant! I hope the rest of your pregnancy is free of meltdowns :).