Hurry Up and Wait.

I like to think of myself as a fairly patient person. I do have deep faith in God, which should ultimately lead to all kinds of patience. I mean, if God is really in control...if His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts higher than our thoughts...if He really has me and mine in the palm of His hand and the shadow of His wings...well, shoot. He can handle my piddly little life circumstances! (I'm going to "amen" myself. That'll preach, y'all) AMEN? Amen.

Whew. The last few weeks have definitely been a test of whether I believe all that. We started house-hunting. Somewhat accidentally on purpose. For some reason, Jerod decided that there were a handful he'd like to go out and see. I mean, yes, I have been keeping tabs on the market pretty well over the past 10 months. As in, he would mention a property he looked at online...and I'd respond with, "Oh the brick one with the cute porch and purple kitchen? I think it's too far out..." To which he would stare at me blankly. "Imagine what else you could do with all the brain power it took to memorize every house for sale in Rock Hill." Yes, he said that to me.
Well, what fun would that be? I'm a visual learner, so after multiple looks at a house and pictures, I knew where they were on the map and which one had a huge painting hung UNDER the window next to the toilet. For real. Who hangs a picture at knee-level? Should we even discuss what manner of stuff might get ON said picture? So, basically looking at other people's houses is a fascinating exercise whether I ended up buying one or not. I *might have created a new addiction.

Long story short (what's the fun in that?), we found a house we love just a few miles away. Double the square footage, very affordable, even closer to interstate...with a stellar front porch and sunroom. Pretty much everything we've ever wanted in a house.

I've never bought a house. Without going into a litany of the back-and-forth, let's just say the past few weeks have been a difficult emotional roller coaster. Waiting on phone calls, checking email...and now our house is for sale. I stare at my phone hoping someone is setting up a showing. Ring, ring, ring, phone.

Then, I remember to pray for our potential buyers. That our house will suit them just it has us. They will have a place to make lovely memories. Prayer. Feels so useless sometimes, but I remind myself that it's the feet to that faith that I profess. I'm not talking to the clouds. This whole experience is a good reminder of all of that. Sometimes you step out in faith and trust the ground to appear beneath your feet.

Lord, please help me trust you in the midst of all this waiting. Help me not to be a worrying waiter. Help me trust in your goodness and grace. Amen. AMEN!

Trash or Created in His image?

I have a friend from college that posted on facebook something about a recent trial in our area. The woman was convicted of killing her newborn. He said something to the effect of "this trash deserves the death penalty."
I have a heart for justice; don't get me wrong. I think it is a basic instinct and God-given (since we are created in His image) instinct to see consequences to misdeeds--our own or other's.
I didn't engage with this friend, since facebook isn't always the forum to start a war of words. Instead, I'll spend a minute here working out my thoughts in the relative privacy of my blog.  :)
I was convicted a few years ago about calling people "White Trash." And as much as I want to describe folks like this to you for the potential humor value, I'm not even allowed to do that. Because it's demeaning and I think horrifies God when we call His children "trash."
I still believe that it is God's heart to redeem humanity. The good, the bad and even the horrifying ones. I think he showed us His great grace and mercy when He forgave the thief on the cross and gave Him an assurance of joining Him in paradise.
As Christians, we have placed ourselves in His seat as judges of human trespasses. Can I understand why someone would kill a sweet, innocent baby? NO. Never. It hurts my heart, as I really literally would have taken the baby to raise. I do know that the enemy our souls is always at work, and the residue of a sinful world can be hard to escape. I don't know what kind of world this mom grew up in. She might have been so broken and scarred that she had nothing to draw from in the way of God's goodness. She deserves a punishment in the natural world, to be sure; but I would love to see her healed and whole.
We are called to love all people and see them as God sees them. I don't have any forgiveness passes to give out. All I can do is point to the cross. It changed the course of history. It changed my life. It can change ANY life. Jesus died for ALL sins. I simply can't believe that we can call anyone "trash" and carry the cross at the same time. We all deserve to be tossed into a pile to be crushed and burned. But Jesus said "NO. I will side with them. They are not trash."